Sadness

After we had our little frosting making adventure we got ourselves ready, ate lunch, and headed to my Mom’s house.  The kids were going to be spending the night at my Mom’s house that night and then going to their other Grandma’s House (Jesse’s Mom’s) on Saturday to spend that night with her.  I had two nights with no kids.  I was so excited – yet I felt so guilty.  I can’t explain why I was feeling guilty.  These Grandmas requested that the kids stay with them.  I didn’t ask for them to stay.  The Grandmas wanted them!! 

As I was driving to my Mom’s house there was a break into my radio station to tell me of a school shooting and small children lives were taken!

I literally said out loud “OH GOD…” grabbed my steering wheel with both hands and prayed and tears came!  Those kids!  Those parents!  Those parent!  Those parents who lost their babies! 

My kids had fallen asleep by now and were sleeping safely in my back seat. 

I thought of my niece, Ellyn, in school and wanting so badly to go and get her! 

I thought of – how do I let my kids go?  How do I let them grow up and leave?  How do I? 

I just ached for those families and was so disgusted!  So disgusted!

I got to my Mom’s house and we did our cookie baking thing – and I just can’t post about it today because I need this moment for these families.  My stuff seems so insignificant…

Praying daily for those families!  I think of them oh so often throughout my day!