Not Always Sunshine & Roses

I write a lot about all the good things that go on here.  I try not to be negative and write about the bad stuff.  However, I want you to know that it is not always good here.  Today was one of those days.

Today started a bit before 6am.  Max is fussing… again!  He has been fussing for the past three days and not sleeping solid.  I lost count of how many times I got up with him last night.  When he started fussing before 6am I just wanted to lay on my belly, scream into my pillow, and kick.  I wasn’t ready to start my day like this.

I forced myself up and there he was standing in his crib with his blanket and nuk crying and wanting me.  I’m get him and walk out of the room and close the door – Mallory starts crying!  Max is still crying in my arms!  I now have two kids crying before 6am!

I tell Mallory that it is not time to get up and she needs to go back to bed and she plays the “but I’ll miss you” card.  So I take her back to bed and tuck her in, play her music, sit on the side of her bed and hold Max.  We sit there that like for awhile until my alarm goes off on my cell phone.  Now they are wide awake.

I take them out to the living room and they instantly want to watch a show.  I turn on the TV and both of them grab their eyes and start grunting because the TV is so bright in our dark morning house.  I sit with them while they watch a show and work on my attitude and try to get myself in a positive mood for the day.

I get up to start the day and get breakfast ready for them.  I’m making juice when Max comes in and is saying “owie, owie” and pointing to his eye.  I look and his eye is all pink and pussy.  You have pink eye!!!  I wipe his eye with a warm wash cloth and he toddles away back to finish his show he was watching.

Jesse decides he still isn’t feeling well (he has been sick since Sunday night) and he was going to stay home from work. 

I’ve got a good spirit going and I take the kids downstairs and Mallory wants to do some school work so we do her Awanas homework and Max plays.  And he plays so well!  He has also been sick for the past 3 to 4 days so it was such a relief to have him actually play and play by himself.

A nurse from Max’s doctor’s office called and decided that since he has been sick that his pink eye is probably viral and it would just need to work it’s course.  I should watch him and if he isn’t better by the end of the week I could bring him in.

I don’t remember what happened but we all ended back up stairs for a while.  Then I decided to take them back downstairs so Jesse could rest again and we were going to bring in the bikes for them to ride downstairs.  Max was clinging to me and wanted me to carry him.  Mally went down first and then I went down carrying Max.  Next thing I know I am slipping and falling down the stairs.  Trying to catch myself and trying to hold onto Max.  I can’t get my footing.  And I fall all the way to the bottom (4 or 5 steps).  My right leg stays up at the top of the steps and the rest of my body goes down and I get to the bottom and Max shoots out of my arms and lands on the concrete floor on his head.  My right leg finally catches up and I am now on the concrete floor too.  We are both crying.  Mally sees me crying and she is now crying.  I grab Max and hold him and try to figure out his damages while my leg is hurting so bad. 

Max is fine.  A few moments later and he remembers we came to ride bikes and he saying “bike” between sobs.

I go to stand up and um… my big toe!!!  My big toe hurts and not just any hurt!  It feels as if the sucker is sprained, if not broken!

I get the bikes out and the kids ride around for a bit and I just sit and think… OMG!  My toe!  It really hurts!  I can’t stop thinking about how bad it hurts!  I bet I seriously sprained it!  What are they going to do for it?  I swear a friend told me she broke a toe and there is nothing they can do for it.  So I didn’t even think of going to the Dr. for them to tell me there was nothing they could do.

I make lunch – which only Mally ate and Max snuggled Jesse and fell asleep so I carried him off to bed.  I think Jesse and Max have the same little virus/bug so I wasn’t afraid of Max getting sick. 

Reading stories to get Mally ready for nap and Max wakes up!  He only slept about 30 minutes!  No way! 

Get Mally down for a nap and I have Max.  He is refusing to sleep!  He wants to snuggle.  He doesn’t want to go to bed.  He won’t fall asleep in my arms, but he will in Jesse’s.  Jesse went to bed himself so it is just Max and I and my broken toe! 

I decide to give Max a bath and maybe that will calm him down and relax him and he will sleep.  After his bath – Mallory is awake from her nap! 

I. can’t. win.

I am so exhausted and I didn’t even do anything today!  I tried so hard to stay positive and then I fell down those stairs and broke my toe and walking is almost on the verge of impossible… I couldn’t be positive anymore!  I was done.  And I fell down those stairs at 10am!  LOL!  At 3pm I finally broke down and took some pain reliever because I was just hoping and hoping it was going to get better that it wasn’t a sprain or brake.  Didn’t happen.  Got worse as the day went on.

Now the kids are in bed for the night.  Fingers crossed!  And I’m sitting here with it elevated and it still hurts – but it feels better not being on it.  I will be praying that Max sleeps threw the night so I do not have to get up 16 times tonight to work with him.  Also another hidden perk – I work tomorrow.  So I can sit at my desk with my foot elevated for 5 hours!  Hopefully that helps it before I am home the rest of the week.  Positive Thinking.  Positing Thinking.  And Good Night.